We had no plans for Passover. No one wants to do anything. My mother has always hosted the Seder and led the planning, and this year, as her voice broke, she told me she didn't want to do it. I offered to do something, anything, even just a nod to tradition, in our home. No takers. So I let it go (go ahead and sing. I am one of 4 people on the planet that has not seen this movie. We no longer have a child of the age that enjoys animated features). Passover 2012-Pre-Diagnosis We used to be the Friday night service type. On a regular basis Abby, Sam and I would attend shul. Sam sat with his friends in the front row, and Abby and I sat with my friends, the parents of Sam's friends, right behind them-within shushing and blessing distance. Three times a year we hosted oneg Shabbat after services in honor of our children's birthdays (Oneg Shabbat means joy of Shabbat so we brought snacks and treats because food = joy, right?). We always had cake, and it had to be from costco. Whe...
Today our son Sam would have been 12. When I originally sat down to write this blog I had plans to make it cheerful or at least upbeat�really. After all, a birthday should be a celebration of life. But the truth is�that�s really not where my heart is right now. The struggle between how you�d like to think and feel�in contrast to the reality of how you think and feel having lost a child so young�is palpable. Bereaved parents don�t want to be �Debbie Downers�; we don�t like feeling sad; but sometimes that�s just our own personal reality. The �new normal� as they say. Don�t get me wrong. There is a lot to be thankful for and, perhaps even more so than others, bereaved parents are indeed thankful for what we still have�our other children, our spouses, our family, our friends, a very supportive community, an opportunity to do good and make a difference�the list is quite long. Yet, there remains a hole in our hearts�a hole in our lives�that...
Comments
Post a Comment